Tuesday, March 21, 2006

How To Destroy a CD:

There are a lot of different reasons for wanting to destroy a CD. Maybe it's a crappy band like U2, or a CD that you burned with stuff that you don't want anyone to see on it, either way, you don't want that CD to ever be played again. Here we will outline several methods for doing this, all work equally well, but some are more intense than others. Intensity will be rated using the internationally accepted intensity scale of Vin Diesels (1-5 Vin Diesels: the more Vin Diesels, the more intense).


1) Microwave It: Put the CD in the microwave until it starts to crack and spark and stuff. Watch it for a second, and then turn off the microwave.


Intensity Rating:


2) Shoot It: Get a gun and pump it full of lead. A shotgun, handgun, rifle, or BB gun will work.


Intensity Rating:


3) Break It: Put it in a newspaper or t-shirt and snap it in half. Do it in your bare hands if you are super manly.


Intensity Rating:


4) Put a Warning on It: Okay, so it isn't quite destroyed, but if your warning is good enough, we guarantee that no one will use it. Ours said "Warning: Trying To Use This CD Will Result In Infertility".


Intensity Rating:


5) Scratch It: Scratch it, a lot. Make sure that it is really scratchy. You can even get creative with it (we didn't).


Intensity Rating:


6) Disguise It: This is another one that doesn't really destroy it, we were just in the mood for drawing a mustache on something.


Intensity Rating:


7) Burn It: Incinerate it with your flamethrower.


Intensity Rating:

78 comments:

Anonymous said...

I run the CD's over

Anonymous said...

Um, what about FIRE?!

Good ol' American pyrotechnia. Burn that CD to a slag heap and The Man will never find out what you had on it.

Anonymous said...

the Mythbusters managed to get CDs to explode and high resolutions, and I have seen that on the internet before.

Anonymous said...

that of course was
AT high revolutions

(i am tired)

Anonymous said...

exploding cds via a dremel
http://www.powerlabs.org/cdexplode.htm

Anonymous said...

Good for Fall Out Girl CD's, and your ENTIRE emo collection!

Anonymous said...

Breaking a cd doesn't really do much. Burning it to a pile of molten plastic works. If you want and easy way, take it outside, put it picture side DOWN on the pavement and run it back and forth. It will scrape off the silver side, which is the actual data.

Anonymous said...

Cut it into tiny pieces and eat it.

Anonymous said...

Disguise it won't work permanently.
99% Isopropanol Alcohol ($2 at a drug store) will clean off "permanent" marker marks or sharpie marker marks from a CD.
It will also clean out a water pipe or hash pipe very well!
Try it at home kids! :)

reno said...

microwave it for 3 seconds. If you want to see some really cool effects, put in 3 cd's (not stacked) and put them in for about 5-6 seconds, depending on your microwave.

Anonymous said...

I feel the need to say:

the reflective coating is not where the actual data is stored... The data is stored on the plastic part of the CD, but the reflective coating allows the laser in your CD-rom drive to read it, rather than pass strait through. Personally, I like to microwave all of my AOL CDs until the pretty flashy stuff goes away, though... :-D

Anonymous said...

Hahaha this is the best website in the world... I seriously laughed for a half and hour just thinking of how retarded this is.

toonbug said...

The only surefire way to destroy a CD is burn 'Oops, I Did It Again!' or any other Britney Skeezers recording to it.
Guaranteed to be disregarded forever.

Anonymous said...

I put in a bucket with bleach and threw a match in it. It was like ashes. I did this for a cd that had a video of me stealing something.

Anonymous said...

didnt u ever hear about giving a cd to a little kid for five minutes

Anonymous said...

If only we knew how to make thermite...

(yes, I am aware of a previous article)

Anonymous said...

Use a flat head screwdriver on the silver side- the silver will instantly peel off, leaving the disc clear. You can scrape off all the silver coating in about 30 seconds.

Do this over a trash can and your are gold.

If you have more than 1 cd, i.e. 15+ etc, stack them together, take a drill with a big drill bit and drill straight through them. The bit will cause the cds to crack as well as peel the silver coating away. Drill a few holes in different places and you are gold. I mean silver.

Anonymous said...

Stick it in the microwave for 5 seconds.

Anonymous said...

lmao, or your could just like...put it in your computer open up windows video player, go to the CD tab and press "rip" you can "Un-burn" your CD lol..

with love,(not really):-)`
Dan :p

Anonymous said...

u forgor one: sharpening the CD so u can kill emos with it

Anonymous said...

I suggest Shredding it with a CD Shredder. http://www.time.com/time/2003/inventions/invshredder.html

Anonymous said...

When im in a bad mood I stab them into little bits, very calming actually.
i also put it lightly against the side of the fan for a couple seconds, then turn it a litle bit and hold it for couple more seconds, keeep doing this and you'll have a completely useless cd with a pretty cool pattern on it(and feel very fulfilled and decide your life might still be worth living after all). yay.

Anonymous said...

Check out DiscEraser.com, a gadget that wipes out your CDs instead of breaking, melting, or microwaving (toxic). It leaves the disc intact, which promotes CD recycling. This is the first environmentally friendly CD destroyer, which unlike shredders, doesn't leave any waste particles. Ideal for home and office use.

Anonymous said...

Get Termite and burn through a stack of rap/R&B ‹(•¿•)›
U

Anonymous said...

I need to destroy my husband's cds. i hate the movies he watches and the music he listens to hen he is drunk and I can't tolerate the blasting noise anymore. But i need to damage the cds in such a way that he does not suspect of scratches and stuff. is there a way to damage a dvd or audio cd without giving any evidence. Who wants to be my partner in crime by telling me how to do it?

Anonymous said...

i like U2...

Anonymous said...

whats really cool is to take some scissors and cut jagged lines around the edge of the CD. You can like throw it at people and stuff...

Anonymous said...

bite it

Dora Renee Wilkerson said...

Very cool! Loved reading that post.

Dora Renee' Wilkerson

Anonymous said...

Use thermite that will do the trick!!!

Anonymous said...

i love buring cd's

Anonymous said...

Shit nigger...

Anonymous said...

Or U can just THROW the cd?!!! :P

Anonymous said...

So I was cleaning out in front of work one day and I saw a bunch of CD's in the parking lot. Upon closer inspection they were CD-R's that had been super glued together into a stack and drilled through with a power drill and the stack had then been chucked into the lot and run over several times with a car.
What could someone have gone to all this trouble to Destroy?
Well I pried the disks apart buffed the burs from the drill holes down put some transparent tape over the cracks so it wouldn't explode and pulled out an old 8x CD burner as the sacrificial drive.
I popped in one of the disks and 20 seconds later a window opened up with the contents of the disk...

Well what do you know "Barely Legal Russian Boys"

Yep someone didn't want their wife to know about their gay porn collection...

Conclusion: breaking, drilling and scuffing a compact disk will NOT render it unreadable!

Anonymous said...

Simply cut the CD with scissors, I cut into 4 pieces. Then when you are out and about deposit one piece in different trash barrels. I use parks, supermarkets, big disposal bins in back of stores etc. I dont go out of my way to do this I just do it in the course of my travels and I do it on different days, times etc. Unless you have john law watching you 24/7 it is impossible for those pieces to come together and be reassembled which would require a lab. All they would find with me is silly shit that I dont want others to see so the joke would be on them anyway! They have machines out now that cost around 40 bucks that will imprint the CD\DVD so that the data cant be read.

Ed said...

Why not just tear a cd motor from a portable cd player, hook it up to a 30 volt source (very fast), add a cd, spin it up, jerk your hand so it flies off and (hopefully) smashes.
Then give it to the rubbish men to crush in their rubbish lorry!

Anonymous said...

PUT 1000volts through it, it will explode

Anonymous said...

that gay man

Anonymous said...

or you can make a disco ball....

http://www.wikihow.com/Make-a-Disco-Ball-With-CDs

Anonymous said...

lol my grandma must be super manly because she broke one of mine in her bear hands when i was 6

Anonymous said...

i prefer the microwave metheod... yet i'm scared of the cancer it probably induces...but it's quite the show so try it out

Anonymous said...

i prefer the microwave method... yet i'm scared of the cancer it probably induces...but it's quite the show so try it out

Anonymous said...

i break the CD with my bare hand :D

Anonymous said...

best way is cut em up all in tiny bits - then next time you catch a boat or go on a cruise deposit the bits on the course of your journy into the sea ;-)

Anonymous said...

LOLZ,I shot it with my airgun it went strait through it hit a rock came back and cracked my safety glasses

Anonymous said...

WHY WONT U SHOOT UR EYE OUT????????

Anonymous said...

ITS BETTER TO PUT IT IN A MICRoWave and see how its starts to spark and glow in diffrent colors

Anonymous said...

You could invest in a DX-CD2 disc grinder , grinds that data layer off CDs, DVDs and Blu-ray discs to 25 microns - impossible to recover any data and auditable.

Anonymous said...

While reading this I realized I have never purposely broken a disk before. So I fished a failed DVD out of my trash can and broke it in half with my hands
the inner layers look pretty cool

Anonymous said...

You know what? I am not manly (even I am a man), I just throw them into the bin...
XD
I like you post

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Anonymous said...

U2 is a good band. Looks like the article writer is one of those "everyone likes them, so I can't" kind of trolls.

MrGoodson2 said...

Trying to think how to destroy old porn cds. Got an idea . Haven't tried it yet. Take your standard scissor jack, put 20 discs under the jack, start jacking up the car ( or the house) something that puts nutcracker pressure back on the discs.

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wowgold said...

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Anonymous said...

Stick it in the Large Hadron Collider. Complete destruction Guaranteed. Or you could give it to the Russians and have them nuke it... they have lots of nukes.

Unknown said...

I don’t have CD from lower quality so I don’t need to burn it I too k al from CD Replication and packaging an please don’t burn it’s not eco-friendly behavior.

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